Good morning! You are going to die
by FallingNarwhals
Summary: Drabbles and one-shots from the world of Magnus Chase. May contain crossovers in later chapters. Now playing: Mama Hearthstone
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own Magnus Chase**

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"I mean, one of us has to be the surrogate Mom to Magnus," Blitz pointed out, looking directly at Hearth so he can read his lips. Blitz may have known Hearthstone for a few years, but he still couldn't get the hang of sign language. He could understand it perfectly fine, but actually signing it? Forget it. He was hopeless.

Hearthstone blinked slowly before replying. _Well, it can't be me. I'm taller then you. Isn't the mom supposed to be the shorter one?_

"Yeah, but this is Midgard. Stereotypes are more relaxed here. And I'm defiantly more of a dad then you."

 _You can cook better then me. And you are fashionable. When you gave me this scarf, you said that it will look striking with my black clothes. That sounds like a Mom to me._ Hearth raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, but you just seem more like a Mom to me then a Dad. You'll be one of those cool moms that lets their kids do whatever they want. I'll be the cool Dad with fashion sense."

Hearth rolled his eyes. _I'll be the so-called Mom._

"Yes. Or you know, we can be those two crazy uncles that hover over our nephew like mother hens."

Hearth perked up. _I like that._

"Yeah, that sounds good. Two homeless uncles looking after our adopted orphaned nephew that is a son of a god. We'll be the poster family for America."

 _And the uncles aren't even human._

"Even better."

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 **So I bet Hearth and Blitz had this argument more then once. Even though Hearth is the "Mom."**

 **Please review!**


	2. Pizza run to Santarpio's

**Well, since I had this idea...**

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"T.J! Run!" Mallory yelled. She threw her sword at the nearby window and the thin glass shattered. She ran, grabbing her sword, and jumped out the shattered window, running towards the getaway car.

She turned back, expecting T.J to be a few steps behind her with the pizza. But T.J was nowhere to be seen.

"T.J!" She yelled again. "Come on!"

The door to the pizza parlor burst open and T.J dashed across the parking lot, holding the pizza box high above his head.

"AHHHHHH!"

Mallory almost laughed out loud. T.J looked ridiculous.

T.J tripped over a cement barrier and face-planted on the sidewalk. The pizza went flying, landing a few feet from Mallory.

"Stop messing around! Get up you idiot!" She grabbed the pizza and jumped in the passanger side of the car. Halfborn was hunched in the driver's side, his tall bulky form barely fitting in the small Volkswagen.

T.J jumped in a second later, his face bloody. A patch of Gravel was stuck to his cheek, and his hair was slick with pizza sauce.

"We'll never speak of this again."

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 **And that's why they never speak of the Pizza run to Santarpio's. The end.**

 **Please review!**


	3. Chapter 3

_Get out of the sun! You are almost completely peterifided!_

"I'm fine! I just need some sunblock-"

Hearth rolled his eyes, and grabbed Blitz's arm. He pulled him away from the shaded stoop he was resting on and into the alleyway, ignoring Blitz's protests.

 _You. Stay here until sunset._

Blitz rolled his eyes. "I told you I am fine!"

 _Really?_ Hearth grabbed a piece of wood and mashed it on Blitz's shoulder. The dwarf didn't flinch, but the board broke in two.

"Alright, maybe I'm a little hard..."

 _You idiot._ Hearth wrapped his arms around Blitz in a rare hug.

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 **Headcannon that Blitz can unpeterify in the night and Hearth freaks out whenever he almost died.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Ahh guys thank you so much for the support! Here's a crossover drabble as a gift ;D**

 **Disclaimer: I do not own any works by Rick Riorden**

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"Whoa buddy," Jack said. "Stop right here."

Magnus looked at the sword, his eyebrows crinkled in confusion. "What's wrong?"

"That kid," Jack seemed to be pointing at a black haired kid eating falafel a few tables away. "He has a sword."

"What?" Magnus turned away from his food to get a better look. The kid was around his age, maybe older. He was wearing a orange shirt with letters that Magnus couldn't quite read. When he reached for a bottle of water, Magnus caught sight of a tattoo on his forearm.

"I don't see a sword." Magnus whispered. Blitz was sending him a weird look, but didn't say anything. Hearth was too busy with his food to see what was going on.

"It's that pen." Sure enough, the kid was flicking a pen back and forth between his fingers. "It's a Greek sword too."

"Greek? Is he using glamor? I mean, it's just a pen, dude."

"Maybe. Can you go talk to him? I always like talking to different swords." Jack hummed.

"What? Jack, I don't even know the guy!"

Jack seemed to huff. "Just go up and ask about his sword."

Magnus rolled his eyes. "I'm not going to go up to a guy and ask him about his imaginary sword. I will eat my food and leave, like a normal person."

He took a bit of his food and ignored Jack's protests for the rest of the hour.


End file.
